The Bigger the Better, the Tighter the Sweater...

I have my bra stuffed today. Although that's nothing new. I'm the owner of many bombshell bras, which contain way more padding than underwire.

But today's padding is different.

It's full of rice. 

No, really.

There's actually a technical name for filling thigh-highs with a measured amount of uncooked carbohydrates, tying and cutting the ends, then stuffing into one's bra: rice sizers. They're used to (unscientifically) determine how a certain size breast implant will look on a certain body.

Because friends, after 16 years of contemplating a boob job, I'm finally getting one.

My first consultation was when I was 18, and despite desperately wanting bigger boobs, I opted instead to pay off credit card debit.

My second was when I was 26, and despite desperately wanting bigger boobs, I decided it'd probably be better to wait until after I started a family.

My third was last week, because here I am: 34, credit card's paid off, kids are had, and I'm still desperately wanting bigger boobs.

 I'm nervous, definitely, but excited and confident in my decision and ready.

So ready.

I've been waiting (praying) for boobs since I've been 12. I've logged countless hours as a teenage girl, sitting in my room doing the "I must, I must, I must increase my bust" exercise. Which doesn't work. I'm looking at you, Judy Blume.

At least they're perky!, I'd say in my boob's defense. I can't even say that anymore. A pregnancy, followed by eight months of nursing, then another pregnancy, followed by ten months of nursing has taken its toll.  My boobs are most certainly not perky anymore.

 And working out? Only increases my desire. The flatter my stomach gets, the flatter my chest gets.

My lingerie drawer is filled with water bras and wonder bras and push up bras and even those chicken cutlets. You know what I'm talking about.

So I'm finally doing something about it. No more talking (thinking, wishing, dreaming) about how much I'd love a boob job. No more being a baby about the pain or feeling guilty about the expense.

I want to feel 100% confident in my skin.

I'd love any and all advice from anyone who's had - or has even contemplated - one.
xo